LUNCH & SNACK [ ... ]- 30.01.2005, Sunday
Had laksa for lunch at one of the coffeeshop in Kenyalang... tasteless...
KFC O.R. Fillet Burger, new product of KFC. You know how Colonel's Burger tastes like? It's exactly the same, only that the bread used is oblong instead of round.

KENYALANG CNY BAZAAR [ ... ]- 30.01.2005, Sunday
Went to the annual CNY Bazaar at Kenyalang. Quite a lot of ppl but not until sardine packed. However, getting a parking place was a bit hard, luckily my dad met his friend and he let us have his place coz he's leaving.

Here are some photos of the bazaar:
preserved fruits
more cuttlefish...
artificial flowers for decor...
stalls selling the sticky cake, must have for CNY, without it CNY wil not be completed. it's believed to bring luck to the household and for the God of the kitchen by chinese community.
decor for the ceiling, all types of lanterns...
shops selling CNY goods...
more shops...
more shops again...
This year, the lunar new year falls on the 9th of February. The year of the rooster!

KUIH MAKMUR [ ... ]- 29.01.2005, Saturday
Made some cookies this afternoon. Kuih Makmur, I'll make it every year, it's the easiest to make. All you need are butter and flour. (Qty needed isn't important, as long that the mixture can become dough and when u rolled it, it will not crack)

1. Soften the butter.
2. Fried the flour to remove excessive moisture. Assessed it based on your instinct.
3. Mix both the ingredients with your hands or mixer.
4. Mix untilthe dough not too wet and it can be rolled into a ball.
5. Rolled them, and place on baking tray to bake.
6. The baking heat (110 degree Celsius) and time... sorry... I usually just experiment with the time ;-p never once the time is fixed. Usually start with 40 minutes, if still not done, add in time again until it is done. Once it turned yellowish or a bit brown, as long that it's not white, it's done.
7. Immediately shift castor sugar or Glucose or Horlick or milk powder etc.... to it.
8. Let it cool, then store in air tight container.
*Beware that it's very fragile, it can crack easily because no egg is used.

PADUNGAN CNY BAZAAR [ ... ]- 29.01.2005, Saturday
Went to the annual CNY Bazaar at Padungan. Quite a lot of ppl but not until sardine packed. One side of the road is closed for this bazaar. The entrance to Chinatown isn't closed to traffic, the opposite direction is closed and it's used for the bazaar, therefore there's a bit of jam but not that bad. It started today until the CNY eve if not mistaken, every evening. So it is advisable for you to use other route in case you want to go to the city centre.

Ppl are selling cny goods at a reasonable price... I guess... coz I didn't stop at each stall, I'm just having my evening walk with my family and joined in the crowd to feel the mood of CNY preparation. There was a stage at the opposite direction that is used for nightly performance such as dances, Tai Ji... The street is lit up with lanterns and decorative lights.

I forgot to bring my camera along so, no photos for it. Next time... I'll be going there quite often for evening walk and also to feast my eyes LOL... tomorrow willgo to Kenyalang CNY Bazaar, must remember to bring camera!!!

I was actually wasn't in the mood of updating this site and also bring my camera around to take pictures for the last 10++ days, still very sad over what had happened. However, I'm trying to gain back momentum in my life... Ganbatte!!!! Now actually feeling much better. Must get over him soon!!!! It's not easy but I must do my best.

GOOGLE AD [ ... ]- 25.01.2005, Tuesday
Google Ad is added into this site.. basically to earn money LOL...

BUSY... TIRED... [ ... ]- 24.01.2005, Monday
Haven't update for quite sometimes... very busy lately and tiring too.

HE'S FOUND [ ... ]- 14.01.2005, Friday
Good news is that Kevin was found but bad news is that he's no longer with us. Finally they had found him. Thanks to everyone who pray for him and help to locate him, though everyone was hoping that he's found alive, at the end the result was negative. He's consider lucky that he's found and identified. Many victims were unidentified. Thank God.

According to his friend, they dug out the mass grave and took samples for DNA test, they found sample from his watch and it's confirmed. His family claimed his body and cremated it in Thailand and brought back to Perth. I'm quite confuse with the date and time.

So... yes... I'm very sad but life still have to go on. He was once the man that I had loved so dearly and it's hard to let go. Fate it's fate, we'll never know what will happen tomorrow. He always said to me that life is meant to be enjoy.

That's the end of our relationship, I have to start a new life all over again. It's hard but what to do? Life... I was thinking that if he's found alive, I'm going to married him a.s.a.p. He had been proposing many times and I just told him that, "I will but not now, I'm too young". If only I had accepted his proposal and things might be different now. I don't know...
Time will heals but I don't know when?

I'm lucky that I had him as my bf and he had thought me lots of things about life. He still have some stuffs that are not fulfilled but it's his time to go and no one can do anything about it at least he had done lots of things that he had always wanted. He had promised to take care of me and love me too bad it's not fulfilled. I had promised him a lot of things too and there's no chance to fullfilled the promises anymore. What left are memories. All e-mails sent after 25th December 2004 were left unread in his mailbox. Strange things was the last mail, he sent it using Gmail and not Hotmail, this is the first time he's using Gmail to send me message. Also, he didn't end the mail with "bye" or any words alike, he eneded it with "Love You". I tried to login into his account but sigh... I don't know his password, no way I can go in. He had archived all the mails that I had sent to him, none of it he deleted. He said he wanted to keep it.

No matter what, don't take anyone for granted. I admit I had taken him for granted, I'm thinking that there're still lots of time to spend with him and fulfilled his dreams. No there isn't any... may his soul rest in peace and may his family be strong and go on with life. He had been a very great son, brother, bf, friend and also pilot. He had live his life to the fullest and I am proud of him.

I will compose a letter to his family, that's all I can do. We hadn't announce our relationship to our family so really nothing much I can do.

When I got this news, I am really in shock! This is part of the e-mail extracted from his friend's mail:
He were suppose to fly from Europe back to Sydney but he found a relieve Pilot (whom relieved him before) that could take his Syd - LA sector. Thus, knowing its Xmas, he took off as in vacation and went to his much beloved island, Phuket. He stayed in Kata Thani hotel which were destroyed by the waves. All his belongings (notebook, mobile Phone, cabin luggage, clothings, cash, passport and palm)were in the room and were now returned to his family. Mrs Chan, his mother gave me all the contacts for me to send the message out to his friends, as she is still too traumatised to do so, she just could not do it.
From what I can understand from his family is, Kevin were supposed to stay in Phuket for 3 days and then would spent his new year in his home town in Malaysia for 3 weeks and then headed back to Sydney via Singapore. Not much were known after.

NOOOOOOOOOO!!! He had even plan to come back here for 3 weeks, this is what he had promised me before, I thought it wouldn't be so soon as he is busy but it seemed like he wanted to give me a surprise. I'm very numb now, I'm angry and at the same time I'm sad. However, when going back to read the first mail from his friend, I still don't believe it. This surprise is too much for me, knowing that he's supposed to be here now with me but no... he's not and he's nowhere to be found.

He's been a very wonderful boyfriend, he made his effort to stay in touch with me and taught me a lot of things. He taught me to be strong and be a better person. Not only that, because of him, I'm more independent now and more confident too. He also taught me to look at life in a different perspective. I'm still in denial. I believe soon he'll be found. He must be somewhere helping out the victims, or he wasn't at the hotel that time and was out to other place but all his things are in his room, he shouldn't be going out without any cash? Or even mobile phone if he's going out of this place. The chances are so slim, many missing victims were announced dead. I'm not sure about him.

He had lighten up people lives. He had been volunteering for Salvation Army in S'pore and did a lot of charities. He had never broken his promise. Those children will going to be very sad because every year Kev will spent Christmas or any occassions with them at least once a year. I'm so angry that he should go to spend his holiday in S'pore with those children and not going to Phuket. I'm sure they're asking where's their "uncle" now? Why hasn't he come to see them?

The last mail I got from him was 25th Dec 2004 from Copenhagen, and the last phone call was on 13th Novemebr 2004 from S'pore. We had planned on our future and it looked so promising. With this disaster, everything is falling apart and I am very lost now. This is the only guy in my life that make so many differences in my life. I love him very much. Where else can I find a great guy like him? It's hard to go tru' life nowadays but I will be strong and this thing happened must be for a reason. I'm sure he wouldn't want me to ruin my own life, he wants me to be happy and successful in life. We had plan so many things but none is done:
1. Buy a yacht and name it after me.
2. Let me jumpseat in his flight.
3. Hug me.
4. Kiss me.
5. Cook for me/cook together.
6. Get married and have children.
7. Travelling around the world.
8. Fly me in his private aircraft.
9. Sail to Phuket only the both of us.
10.Come back to Kuching so that I can introduce him to my family.
11.Teach me how to jet-ski and scuba.
12.Go camping together.
13. Teach me to ride on a horse.
14. Let me drive his Z4 (in fact a Ferrari), etc.

I didn't expect this new year is going to be an unhappy year for me. I didn't expect that 2004 ended like that without me knowing that he's missing. I had been mailing him since 26th Decemebr almost everyday but got nothing from him, I guess he might be busy but...

All I can do now is pray and hope for the best. He's always been a lucky person and hopefully he's lucky enough now too. God... please give me a sign and tell me where he is now. Amen. Please pray for him too.

Strange thing is that I couldn't find his name in any missing people list in the Internet and I am not sure whether he is listed as missing M'sian or Australian. Please help me to locate him if you can but all I can give you is his full name: Kevin Chan Lee Seong, a Malaysian with Aus PR, a pilot with Qantas, born in the year 1969, almost 6ft in height. This is his photo:

I don't know why? Everytime the man that I love will not be mine at the end. So far they all ended up with other girls. Will he or will he not? I'm still waitng for an answer...

WHERE ARE YOU KEV? [ ... ]- 11.01.2005, Tuesday
I just couldn't believe what I got here! I got an e-mail telling me that my bf is missing! Since 26th Dec 2004, he's missing until today. I only got to know about it today when I received an e-mail from his close friend in Sydney. Aren't he supposed to be in LA for New Year? How can he be in Phuket? This cannot be! He promised to contact me after 6th January 2005 when things are back to normal as he's very busy flying because many pilots were on Christmas holiday. Now I got this news telling me he's still listed as missing person in Phuket Tsunami striked. Till now, I got no news from him, he must be busy.

I'm thinking it's only a prank. No way that he's in Phuket. I had e-mailed his so called "friend" to confirm by asking some personal questions. We'll see how it goes... I really hope it's a prank, he must not leave me without saying goodbye! I'm very confuse now...

KENNY ROGER'S ROASTED [ ... ]- 08.01.2005, Saturday
Went to Kenny Roger's for dinner, situated at Plaza Walk, just outside Sarawak Plaza. The air-con was so cold because only a few people in there.
The famous chicken roasted with charcoal.
The interior. You have the choice of sitting outdoor but personally I don't recommend it, too noisy and too polluted with vehicles' noice and smoke.
The menu.
the drinks, orang juice and 100-plus.
Cheezy Chicken. (1/4 black pepper chicken with crisp salad and spaghetti lazed with cheese and minced chicken)
Beef Bolog... (sorry, I forgot how to spell the word) (1/4 clack pepper chicken with fruit salad and spaghetti lazed with tomato puree and minced beef).

The meal roughly cost about RM18 per head.

HOME DELICIOUS [ ... ]- 08.01.2005, Saturday
After movie, me and my friend went for a drink at this newly opened cafe, Home Delicious.

Left: Ice Blended Chocolate Sweet Lover(couldn't recallthe exact name, too long ;p)
Right: Two scoops of ice cream.

I noticed they had lots of variety of food, drinks and desserts. Having quite a difficult time to make my choice because I had to make sure I'm not going to fill all the space in my stomach for the dinner at Kenny Roger's. Then when I saw the word "CHOCOLATE", oh my... I ordered it and it's such a big cup. I was quite full after that.

The interior decor is simple and clean. It has a very eye-catching signboard, bright yellow and pink. Here's the address for it: Lot 121, Section 33, KTLD, Jalan Tabuan, Kuching. It's opposite Borneo Hotel, a new shoplot, next to Mayfair.

THE DOLL MASTER [ ... ]- 08.01.2005, Saturday
Went to watch this new Korean horror movie at Star Cineplex. It's about a doll revenged for its master and also a doll protecting its master by sacrificing itself. It has a pretty sad ending. Hmmm... for me, it wasn' t scary, I didn't shut my eyes at all unlike horror movies that I had watched before. Everyone was laughing whenever there were horror sequels, only one guy sitting at the back kept shouting and he's always" one beat slower". After we laughed, he'll screamed. We all turned our head and laughed at him.

Here's how the stories goes...

4 persons (a student, a sculptor, a photographer and a novelist) were invited to a doll gallery. They were given a room each and each room with scary decor. Such as scary looking doll holding the mirror, the lamps etc. Even in the toilet too. An undercover cop joined in too to investingate on a murder case that happened there. They are all actually descendents of the four that killed the doll's master because they accused him of killing his girlfriend. He made a doll especially for his girlfriend that looked like her. The doll withnessed the murder and decided to revenge by posessing a woman that found it.

Another doll called Mina lived with the woman. All four of them are supposed to be killed due to their ancestors wrong doing. Mina begged the woman not to kill her master. Mina was a doll owned by the sculptor when she's a little girl and she was thrown away due to unknown reason. Mina finally met her master in this gallery but her master didn't recognize her. She was so sad but later on when her master realized that she's the doll she owned last time, her master freaked out and wanted to killed her. Mina was so distraught and tried to killed her master instead, In the midst of struggling to kill her master, she saw the scar on her master's hand. She recalled how her master had saved her from an accident last time. With that, she's no more evil and promise to protect her master from the woman.

Too bad, Mina was killed by the woman. Oh well... there're actually quite a lot of thing happened in between on how each of the guest was killed but I'm too lazy to tell everything and also not to spoil the whole fun of it hahah... However I'm going to reveal the ending. FYI, I'm the kind that always revealed in detailed what happened in the beginnig and the end but never the middle. That's my style.


At the end, all died except the sculptor and the woman's husband that was prisoned and chained. They both burnt all dolls in the gallery and that's it! By the way, the real murderer was actually the cop's grandfather. End of story.

HELLO 2005 ! [ ... ]- 01.01.2005, Saturday
Ok, it's 2005! New look of Sweet Surrender and also a new server, new hosting, new domain name for it. No more unwanted adverts and pop-ups anymore. However I will put up my own advert whenever I wanted. It will not be that annoying anymore since I can fully control it on my own. Thanks to Jimmy that help me with setting up, uploading and reminded me that I could use this server because I had forgotten that I also owned one third of http://www.99.com.my.

This year, it looked pretty fresh and much feminine compare to previous versions. It's green and it's refreshing just like what I'm going tru' now, everything will start from fresh this year hunting down my destiny in relationship and career. I had learnt a lot last year and hopefully
this year will be a fruitful year. How I decide to use this colour? Well... it started with a plate printed with lemon picture. Only managed to start with this website design on 31st December 2004 as I'm busy with work lately. It took me quite a while in transfering all my files from the old server to the new server.

I would like to take this opportunity to thank everyone that had help me tru' my ups and downs last year. Thanks to my family and my friends and most improtantly my darling that taught me a lot of things about life and make me a mature and more understanding person.

Unfortunately 2004 ended tragicly and sadly for many people. Hope that this year will be a better year. To all of you out there, wishing you a great year ahead!